Serenity

Peace, serenity… to clear my mind and stay away from the enemy

Focusing all my energy on them was leaving me breathlessly

The worst part is they never felt any empathy

I was focused on them and they were also just focused on themselves

Peace, clarity…to focus most of my energy on myself instead of them

The way they were living their life, it was so dreadfully

In them I tried to find therapy, but they’re mostly focused on jealousy

They were never close to becoming my remedy, I walked away, my heart feeling heavily

I wanted to help them, but I couldn’t allow the process to hurt me mentally

Peace, heavenly…I wanted to love them, but had to learn to love myself first

I could still love them from far, separately, I’ll heal essentially

I’ll love them while still holding tight to my identity

If you love others before yourself, you’ll eventually lose your soul accidentally

Sleep Paralysis

Sleep paralysis, I cannot move

Stuck in analysis, to fight or remain calm

My mind is alarmed, it’s wide awake while my body is asleep

Hearing footsteps around me, getting closer to my body

I cannot move, the paralysis I cannot remove

Dark shadows surround me, and I cannot move

To enjoy the experience or cry in terror, I cannot choose

“Snap out of it, it’s just a dream!”, or is it?

A horrific alignment, when my mind and body cannot come to an agreement

It feels like they get a signal, the demons

They say “it’s all in your head”, but I know what I was feeling

Miraculous Moments

Miraculous moments finally starting to happen

I was stuck in a misfortune for a really long time

I always proceeded with caution

But sometimes we get extreme pain without a warning

Some days it feels like torture, but I learned to tackle it portion by portion

My patience would shorten, some days I had really sad mornings

I thought I was alone, but I noticed the pain was quite common

I always recover from pain, but the experiences are never forgotten

My positive thoughts played a huge role, my thoughts are extremely important

Got so close to my positive thoughts, the negative thoughts become foreign

Next Step

I don’t want to overstep

I don’t want to be here if I’m not wanted here…

Let me know, I could easily disappear

You keep toying with my mind

Tell me how you really feel…

Just for a slight second be real

You swore that you would love me

But moments with you and I never feel wanted

I want to sit on your lap, you’re too busy with your cigar

Your vibe was a vibe I once admired

I guess your feelings for me expired

Who knew…that there was limit to love me?

Who knew… that you once loved me so hard?

Now you want me away

And you can’t even be real about it

Fear

The enemy is near

It has caused me so many tears

Year after year, I’ve struggle to fight it

It has stopped my mind so many times from thinking clear

It has blinded my vision from seeing clear

It weakens my energy, my vibe, my immune system

It takes complete control until I’ve become a victim

It goes as far as clouding my wisdom

It literally traps me in my own kingdom

The enemy is near, the enemy is fear

Faith will overpower it

A strong willpower will overpower it

A controlled, meditative mind will overpower it

I have control to kill it, and I’m not sleeping on it

Small Talk

Small talk

I miss our long walks

I stare at the ashes that fall from your cigarette

You’re here with me, but then again not

I’m conversing with your silhouette

Cold sweat, mixed with emotions

Your vibe now feels like a threat

I try to forget, but now I’m full of regrets

Upset as I sit alone watching the sunset

I wish we could go back to when we first met

Erase you from my memories and completely forget

Take my heart

Take my heart, but only if you’re going to treat it right

Love me when the sun is out, love me in the night

This is quite frightful

But you seem quite delightful

I would be lying if I said I’m not a little doubtful

But to be honest, I’ m also extremely grateful

A little bit in denial, but at the same time it’s quite exciting

I’m grateful for your arrival

You understand me, you’re quite thoughtful

Old thoughts need to get recycled

I can’t let them get in between this feeling of enlightenment

Take my heart, but only if you’re going to treat it right

Almost Prisoner

Sound of silence

As the negative energy hits my mind

I’m freaking out..

I slowly start losing my faith

I become a prisoner 

I slowly start losing my breath 

This experience felt very close to death

Sound of silence

As I convert the negative energy to positive energy

Fear won’t get me far, it’ll just paralyze me

I’m trying hard to fight it, you can hear my cries

The fear slowly vanishes from my eyes

I won’t stop fighting, I’m not stopping until I feel enlightened

Sound of silence

As I notice I had to almost die to feel alive

Had to drown in darkness to appreciate my enlightenment 

Had to drown in darkness to learn how to live again

Dark energy almost destroyed me

It all came down to how bad I wanted to feel alive…

Something Sacred

Hold my hand and promise that you’ll never ever let go

I’m scared, but this might be something sacred

I want someone to love me, I’m tired of the hatred

My mind is a little complicated, but it has slowly become awakened

I’ve waited…I’ve waited for this kind of love

Don’t say words you can’t keep, I’m tired of my time being wasted

I want something to finally turn out magical

Most of my experiences have been quiet tragical

Our vibe seems to be compatible 

Hold my hand and promise that you’ll never ever let go

Anxiety

Anxiety caused mostly by society

It’s my fault for giving them the authority

Such an irony 

My thoughts become priority

Must treat myself with such generosity 

I must take care of my thoughts reliably 

If I lose myself, I lose my mentality 

If I lose myself, I lose my sanity 

Fighting my monsters which sometimes disguise as humanity

Fighting myself sometimes angrily

Sometimes I wish this was all a fantasy 

Fighting the negative thoughts savagely 

Fighting the negative thoughts so I don’t fully lose my personality 

Anxiety caused mostly by society 

My mind is full of positive thoughts, for the negative thoughts there is no capacity

Trying every strategy, so my soul doesn’t end in tragedy