I want to touch you but I need your consent
With me you can vent, you shared your ideas and I knew what you meant
The context you provided was enough, it made me content
Your personality is so sweet and so is your scent
You are perfect, all the way from your vibe to your accent
Your sweet aura I can accept
I’m not going to pretend, your soul I respect
Your mindset I comprehend
This feels right, this is correct
I want to love you but I need your consent
Nowhere to run
There is an external magnet holding me back
I tried connecting with you spiritually
You only wanted me sexually
After you, my heart is protected with rendered walls
It keeps my heart from becoming radiant
It’s stopping my mind from the awakened
Enigmatic secrets that you left
I question them on a daily
And I get no replies
The dosage of you I took is too high
I keep hoping truth would defend me
But sometimes it’s against me
It’s never personal
It’s just complex
Your complexion is irresistible
But I must behave
Slowly graduating but proceeding in baby steps
I want to intertwine spirits but I still haven’t murdered my insecurities
I’ve executed an illustrious plan to feel like a beauty goddess
I love your face but this is more than just appearance
(A) very sad story
(B)ecause you left me alone
(C)an’t explain it myself
(D)id you choose to do this?
(E)ventually you’ll notice the damage you caused
(F)rankly, you never gave a fuck to apologize
(G)lorious Angels would fall from the sky
(H)ow come it’s so hard for you to apologize?
(I) thought you were such a genuine soul
(J)ustice I deserve
(K)nowing I loved you, you still hurt me
(L)oving me was never a choice
(M)ade me look and feel so foolish
(N)ot caring about the thoughts in my head
(O)f course it taught me a lesson
(P)robably from so much pain
(Q)uestions arise in my head each day
(R)easons really hard to explain
(S)ad songs playing in the radio
(T)omorrow is a new day
(U)nclear about when the pain will faint
(V)isions are now changed
(W)ithout you I’ll get ahead
(X)enophobia is what you felt
(Y)ou were never worth my time
(Z)ap! just like that my energy has changed
You’re now aware that you no longer chain me
You’re upset that you no longer get to control my gains
And now you claim that I’m a rebel
When really, I’m just on a different level
You’re stuck behind and I’m trying to win the life medal
You’re going around telling everyone I’m a rebel
Because I refuse to resemble your unconditional negative vibe
Which most times it’s hard to describe because it’s not a genuine vibe
But I’m a rebel because I don’t want to play with the devil
It’s a matter of perspective
if you don’t agree you can at least respect it
that doesn’t mean you have to accept it
it doesn’t even have to affect you
Some people say cruel words and then they regret it
their pride wont let them apologize, so they forget it
then they get upset when you protest it
It’s a matter of mindset
How happy are you and how depressed
how often do you get upset
We want to believe but we always suspect
Are you taking care of yourself or do you appear unkempt
Can you always blame us? we have promises unkept
It’s a matter of perspective
If you don’t agree you can at least respect it
that doesn’t mean you have to accept it
A sustainable illusion
one with a better conclusion
one where your touch feels like magic
instead of problematic
Your touch electrifies my essence
it felt more like a blessing than a lesson
in my illusion of us, I deeply enjoyed your presence
you never had me guessing
I’m ready for another session
You rub my head and clear all my tensions
You gave me attention and affection
no exceptions
it was all perfection
had a rude awakening
when I realized it was a dream of my reflection
it wasn’t real, just my perception
I’m not sure if you’ll love me eternal but please love me internal
Love me in the light and love me nocturnal
I need straight lines, please don’t make me go in circles
Whether you accept or deny this love referral, please be straight up, be verbal
Love me in the shadows and love me universal
Love me in Heaven and love me infernal
Tell me how you feel so I can write it in my journal
I’m not sure if you’ll love me eternal, but please love me internal and love me external
Surprisingly I’ve managed to keep my character placid
even though my heart feels like it’s being dripped in acid
it’s received so many beats
I once thought it would turn into ashes
Many times I thought my heart wouldn’t be able to take it and it would lead me into a casket
I’ve been tapping into my senses
checking my tone and commitment to remain afloat
I’m doing it alone and trying it to keep it under control
If I don’t take notes of it, my mind will explode
Reading positive quotes
don’t want any bad feelings to be provoked
consuming interrupted remedy
consuming the remedies heavily
to help me cope and remain steadily
I’ve been searching for this recipe
I got tired of living so dreadfully
I don’t need anyone’s empathy
I’m giving my heart a high feeling of ecstasy
it’s been chemically intoxicated
I’m fighting for clarity endlessly
I have control over my destiny
I knew one day you would change
But I wasn’t waiting for that day to be today
Can we rearrange for another date?
this feeling I really hate
is it up for debate?
I feel betrayed
it feels like a blade
I slaved for our love
and you’re the one who got paid
never provided your aide
my love was handmade
you wanted a handmaid
the love I provided you erased
