Wandered Mind

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I’ve been trying to keep my mind in one piece

I’m trying to keep the focus

But my mind loves to wander, out of this world, into danger zones

Stoned, crazy hormones, paying attention to people’s tone

I try to socialize with headphones on

I’m trying to converse but I’m glued to my phone

I like to explore people’s world, but it’s even better when I explore my own

Traveling to the unknown

I get home, put down my phone, and begin to clone my thoughts

I fuck up, I have caught myself

I move on, I taught myself

Trying to pay attention to your words, but my mind has wandered

Your lips are moving but I can’t hear your words

I’m out of this earth

I see you but you’re still a blur

One eye, two eyes, I’m on the third

My third eye sparks and I wander

My Salvation

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My mind was in constant isolation

And you adjusted that

You might be the reason for my salvation

You provided sustainable formulas

I used them as tools, making sure they weren’t cruel

I’m not trying to be a fool

Once again, I’m tired of catching the blame

Again and again, the same drain, the same pain

But you might be my salvation

You make me feel sane, you make me feel Zen

I want to open the doorway to you but I’m afraid

I’m so tired of leaving it closed

Because so many time it’s been exposed

For a long time that door has been locked

A cloud of doubt kept it blocked

My heart slowly dropped but when you came around it quickly stopped

You might be my salvation

You made it in my heart, congratulations

Stuck in Twilight Zone

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We were in the final stages
In a twilight phase
Too many times I tried to shine light
Too many times that was just an imaginary thought
My soul is native to your thoughts
It feels every movement you make
Piercing through resources
I’ve come up with a hypothesis
In order to be happy with you
I would need to freeze my thoughts
and that thought doesn’t sit right
Incoming breaths as I try to understand
I can’t understand why the duration of the love was so short
If it was supposedly pure
But your patterns always made me feel insecure
I don’t even know why I’m still contemplating
I just want a peace formula
I deserve better

 

 

*sorry for being MIA, I was really sick. But I am back 🙂 *

 

 

Your consent

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I want to touch you but I need your consent

With me you can vent, you shared your ideas and I knew what you meant

The context you provided was enough, it made me content

Your personality is so sweet and so is your scent

You are perfect, all the way from your vibe to your accent

Your sweet aura I can accept 

I’m not going to pretend, your soul I respect

Your mindset I comprehend

This feels right, this is correct

I want to love you but I need your consent

Nowhere to run

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Nowhere to run

There is an external magnet holding me back

I tried connecting with you spiritually

You only wanted me sexually

After you, my heart is protected with rendered walls

It keeps my heart from becoming radiant

It’s stopping my mind from the awakened

Enigmatic secrets that you left

I question them on a daily

And I get no replies

The dosage of you I took is too high

I keep hoping truth would defend me

But sometimes it’s against me

Escape

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Lately, I’ve been trying to escape

Everyday I thought about running away

Get lost in a parade, all I do is complain

I was going to suffocate, all those feelings you evacuated 

Each day you create new ideas for me to love, ones I embrace

My mind was full of mistakes, I was so afraid

New memories you create, ones I won’t debate 

You helped my mind stay in shape

You’re a hero without a cape

I was asleep and now I’m awake

I wanted to escape but because of you I’ll stay 

Calm Atmosphere

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I’ve learned how to sink into calmness

Beyond the dark atmosphere

I’m enjoying the calm air, the calm energy

Sitting in a pose, palms facing up

The soft, perfect silence

Sweat pants, messy hair, and some lip balm

Music playing, high in thoughts, high in energy

I’m feeling calm

My concentration heightened, my sadness slowly dying

The world was still spinning, but at a comfortable speed

I’ve learned how to properly plant my seeds

But I had to be soaked in chaos first

When darkness attacks me, I shut it down with a harmonious wave

Baby Steps

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It’s never personal

It’s just complex

Your complexion is irresistible

But I must behave

Slowly graduating but proceeding in baby steps

I want to intertwine spirits but I still haven’t murdered my insecurities

I’ve executed an illustrious plan to feel like a beauty goddess

I love your face but this is more than just appearance

A-Z

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(A) very sad story

(B)ecause you left me alone

(C)an’t explain it myself

(D)id you choose to do this?

(E)ventually you’ll notice the damage you caused

(F)rankly, you never gave a fuck to apologize

(G)lorious Angels would fall from the sky

(H)ow come it’s so hard for you to apologize?

(I) thought you were such a genuine soul

(J)ustice I deserve

(K)nowing I loved you, you still hurt me

(L)oving me was never a choice

(M)ade me look and feel so foolish

(N)ot caring about the thoughts in my head

(O)f course it taught me a lesson

(P)robably from so much pain

(Q)uestions arise in my head each day

(R)easons really hard to explain

(S)ad songs playing in the radio

(T)omorrow is a new day

(U)nclear about when the pain will faint

(V)isions are now changed

(W)ithout you I’ll get ahead

(X)enophobia is what you felt

(Y)ou were never worth my time

(Z)ap! just like that my energy has changed

Rebel

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You’re now aware that you no longer chain me

You’re upset that you no longer get to control my gains

And now you claim that I’m a rebel

When really, I’m just on a different level

You’re stuck behind and I’m trying to win the life medal

You’re going around telling everyone I’m a rebel

Because I refuse to resemble your unconditional negative vibe

Which most times it’s hard to describe because it’s not a genuine vibe

But I’m a rebel because I don’t want to play with the devil